The “English” Names I Can’t Stand
February 16th, 2006 by MarkOne peculiarity about Chinese ESL learners is that they usually want “English” names. Back when I was learning French, I didn’t take to calling myself Jean-marc; when I was learning Japanese, I didn’t call myself Taka. I just used my English name phoneticized into Katakana. I saw no need to change my name to learn a new language. Maybe I’d change the pronunciation, but no more. Most of my foreign friends from back when I was in the states were the same. Try telling my Japanese buddy Tomohiro that he should adopt an English name, like Tom and he’ll tell you he’s Japanese and that Tomo’s his name. The same went for my other friends, Yoshi, Naoki, Tadashi, Tomohiko, and even the notoriously unpronounceable Ryuta.
Chinese people aren’t like that. To suggest to a mother that she just allow her child to be called 專文 (zhuān wén) in my class, is blasphemy. She’ll insist that without a proper “English” name, the chance to “soak American culture” just won’t be the same. I’ve heard this opinion from dozens of parents. Heck, I even saw one kid who didn’t want an English name get in a yelling match with his dad over it. Nearly all the kids want English names, though. Some even want two.
Naturally enough, a lot of the “English” names they pick aren’t very English at all. I don’t think I ever met or heard of a single Coco before I came to Taiwan (though I did know a dog named Cocoa), but I must have taught or met at least 30 Cocos since coming here. The same goes for Kiki, Yoyo, Mimi, and several other popular “English” names here. I’m not really a big fan of these names, since they AREN’T going to familiarize the kids with commonly used English names. But, hey. If it makes them happy, then why not?
There is one kind of “English” name, though, that I can’t stand. It’s the mis-spelt name given by Taiwanese teachers from the public schools. My new students of this type have included an Anterny, a Cynphia, an Avy, a Jesper, a Weever, a San, and a Weanston. The problem with these “English” names, beyond the fact that they aren’t English, is that English speakers (including myself) always think that the kids are mispronouncing real names. I already have a lot of names to remember, and it really sucks trying to remember if Jesper is the one who insists that is name is pronounced as “Jeesper” or if it was Cynphia that insists she’s “Seenvia”. Worse yet, after practicing with each other for a few years, the kids will have the exact same problems with real English names. I don’t really want to be some sort of “cultural imperialist”, but there is a point at which I can’t take the Engrish. I sat the parents down and explained that their kids’ names were the result of letting non-natives with really screwed up phonics try to remember real names. At first they were incredulous. “Are you sure Weanston’s not a popular English name?” Fortunately, by the end, I got Cynphia to become Cynthia, Avy to become Amy, Jesper to become Jasper, Weever to become Webber, San to become Sam, and Weanston to become Winston. Anterny isn’t budging, though.
There are tons of ways to try to absorb American culture. Aside from Hollywood, there’s great access to US video games, children’s stories, American restaurants, American music… the list goes on. I’m not sure if picking an “English” name will help students assimilate any more of the culture or not, but I’m positive picking a name like “Weanston” won’t.
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February 17th, 2006 at 1:31 am
Perhaps Anterny doesn’t hear much of a difference between that and Anthony. That would actually be a great opportunity to convince him to switch, so that he could grow into the correct “nth” sound, by identifying with it. Did “Weever” actually sound more like “Webber” than “Weaver”?. BTW, I’ve seen the name “Coco” many times here in the USA. I’ve even seen it in TV Guide and other magazine articles.
If you want them to get used to many English names, why not have them “adopt” a new name each month from a list of common names? Of course, they’d have to have a placard or badge to keep them straight (or something)…
February 17th, 2006 at 3:36 am
Hi there great blog. One trivia that might be of interest: some Japanese (at least the ones i’ve met in London) do in fact choose to Anglicize their names. Thus any name that begins with “Tomo-” gets transliterated to Tom or Tommy; “Ken-” becomes, well, Ken or Kenny; and don’t forget the sizable number of Erika’s and Lisa’s and Mari’s (Mary/Marie) and Emi’s (Amy)..
But you’re right: It’s unlikely Takashi’s parents will one day decide to call him Bob.
February 17th, 2006 at 6:05 am
Many of the foreigners in Taiwan also take a Chinese name just as Chinese people almost always take English names in an English speaking environment. I think it is just easier for everyone. Apart from the occaasional Ryuta, I really think Japanese sounds are a lot easier for English speakers to process than Chinese sounds. It just plain makes sense for Chinese folks to get English names…not Weanston though.
I hate it when the occasional westerner decide to show his respect for me and my culture by insisting on calling me by my Chinese name (Hua-chih is the awful passport transliteration…no access to chinese characters on this computer). They inevitably butcher it then whine “am I getting it right?” until I aquiesce and tell them that it is good enough. I got so sick and tired of this that now if any non-chinese speaking person want to know how to say my Chinese name, I tell them that it is pronounced “Hot-Chik”.
February 17th, 2006 at 12:56 pm
I have no worries that Anterny won’t figure it out in a year or two. Once his phonics are good and he’s had exposure to enough English names, he’ll realize what kind of name he has. All the kids will be okay in terms of being familiar with names, eventually. In the second year, we get into extensive reading. Even though it is with easy material, like the Bookworms graded readers, it’s pretty much impossible to read 50 pages a week and NOT get familiar with the most common English names. The kids would probably be fine if even if they all had names like Raindy, Kaivun and Samansa. I’d be bat-shit insane, though.
Stephan, are most of your American acquaintances named Coco of an older generation maybe? I’m kind of surprised you’ve run in to Coco so much and that I didn’t, but maybe it’s just random chance.
Jufuku, I’ve known lots of Japanese people who shorten their names, too. My best friend Kei-ichi went by Kei, I knew a Ken-motsu who went by Ken, and both Tomohiko and Tomohiro went by Tomo. It does surprise me to hear of a Tomo going by Tom, though.
February 17th, 2006 at 1:03 pm
I would like to take it a step further, in that I don’t like even having my name’s pronunciation butchered to accommodate Japanese people here. I never understood why when a Japanese person goes to America, Americans bad pronunciation of a Japanese name gets corrected while at the same time when an American goes to Japan, the pronunciation must get changed to match Japan. I see a consistent inconsistency. People want it consistently done their way. Accordingly, I do my best to pronounce non-English names no matter where I am, and I would like people here to pronounce my name as best they can as well.
It also always bothered me that I had to write my name in Katakana. I just don’t like the looks of Katakana, and I don’t like the idea of being forced to write my name in Katakana simply because I was a foreigner. Accordingly I write my name in Hiragana as a form of protest :D.
February 17th, 2006 at 1:06 pm
Battlepanda, that’s a really good point about foreigners learning Chinese names, too. When I was in my first Japanese class, the teacher didn’t even ask us if we wanted “real” Japanese names or not. She just taught us how to use Japanese pronunciation to say our English names. In my Chinese classes on the other hand, we HAD to have Chinese names or at least a surname and a transliterated given name. Also, when I got my resident visa in Taiwan, I HAD to get a “Chinese name” at the police office. I’ve heard they’re pretty inconsistent about that though.
As a side note, I DON’T consider transliterations to be English names for non-US (Brit, etc.) people, or to be Chinese names for westerners. For example, Yao Ming, Chow Yun Fat, and Zhang Zi Yi don’t count as English names in my mind since they are just romanizations of those people’s “real” names. “Jackie” Chan does, though. In the same vein, if I go by 馬克 (the transliteration of “Mark”), that’s not really a “Chinese name”.
I think I’ve had some of your same experiences, but in reverse. It’s a little more extreme here, though. You don’t like Americans mangling your real name? I can count the Taiwanese people (who aren’t my students) that call me Mark instead of “mock” or “mockuh” on one hand. Worse yet, they INSIST I use my real name, not a Chinese name. To top it off, the vast majority refuse to use their real (i.e. Chinese) names with me and insist that their weird and often horribly mispronounced “English” names are their real names. Can you even imagine what it would be like if Americans nearly all insisted that you use your Chinese name, gave you only their weird Chinese names and said that those were their real names?
February 17th, 2006 at 10:04 pm
Darin, maybe you should move to Taiwan, and I should move to Japan. That way people here will work hard to accommodate your language, people there will make me adjust to theirs, and we’ll both be happier… until we find new pet peeves
February 17th, 2006 at 10:17 pm
which one is ‘here’ and which one is ‘there’? I’m so confused. Either way, yea! screw you Japan! hehe
February 17th, 2006 at 10:41 pm
I’m in Taiwan, and you’re in Japan, right?
February 18th, 2006 at 1:23 pm
don’t forget my favorite ‘english’ name: Tarcy (Su)
anyway, the funny thing is that’s how i got my name. on the first day of class when i first started learning english in taiwan, the american teacher went around the room assigning random english names to the students. i just happend to get ‘warren’ and it’s been with me since. i personally think that it is done for the sake of the instructor; easier for her to identify the students and no point to remember those ‘weird’ chinese names. now, since this is over 20 years ago, i would think that this practice of getting an english names has plenty of time getting ingrained into the general public as part of the learning process.
February 19th, 2006 at 8:10 am
When I took Spanish in high school, we all took Spanish names. We had fun with it, but I think it did help. We got used to common Spanish names and could pronounce and remember them better when the need for Spanish arose. As for picking a bastardization for a name, that will just get you confused and in trouble!
Battlepanda, I fully believe that you don’t like it when people insist on pronouncing your Chinese name out of respect. Not everyone is like that, though. I know a guy named Souhaibe (Soo-Eye) and most people call him Dale. I can see in his face how happy he was when I learned his real name.
How are people to know whether they should make the effort to learn your real name? I’d ask you not to get upset with anyone unless you straight up tell them what to call you.
Darin, I used to be in the same boat. I didn’t want my name butchered or changed when I went to Guatemala. I’m often Miguel down there. But after being down there a couple of times, I don’t mind it so much. I think it is easier for everyone and I now introduce myself as Miguel when speaking Spanish.
Instead of having your name mispronounced, would you consider taking a Japanese name?
February 20th, 2006 at 6:35 am
I used to be pretty lenient on the name thing, but in the last few years I’ve been taking students aside and explaining that “Doris” and “Gilbert” are not hip names of the cool generation. I’ve basically had my fill of “Winston” and “Mabel”, and don’t get me started on Queena, Piggy, Egg, Rabbit, Ant, and Cloudy (all names held by legal adults I’ve taught). Basically, I’ve found the simplest way to get the point across is to confirm that yes, indeed, “Doris” is not a common name — and then point out that the reason it is uncommon is that it is not considered a good name to have.
Two factors at work. First, the kids want unusual names. And second, many of the names we might think sound beautiful, like “Rachel”, sound ugly to Chinese ears. And then, as DtS notes above, there are the inevitable misspellings and mispronounciations. Another problem is short forms and variants — Ann, Annie, and Anna are basically related names which I often interchange. This results in indignant corrections, or even a refusal on Ann’s part to answer to Annie.
February 22nd, 2006 at 2:41 am
I can’t say for everyone, but I sure met a lot of 2nd generation Japanese with Japanese names and 2nd generation Mexicans with Spanish names when I was growing up in the US. I can’t say for Chinese people, though. There wasn’t really a big Chinese population where I grew up… I knew lots of actual Chinese people (i.e., PRC citizens) as co-workers, but never any American-born children of Chinese parents.
March 1st, 2006 at 2:59 pm
Jesper is a real name in Danish/Norwegian. I knew a Chinese American kid back in Arizona named “Janson” and not “Jason”. “Janson” is a real last name in Scandinavia, but not a first name.
When I studied Spanish in the States, we took Spanish names too. I was “Benito” one year and “Adolfo” another. Yeah, I knew about the fascist connection, I thought it was cute at the time.
March 1st, 2006 at 3:16 pm
Be that as it may, “Jesper” does not appear in any baby book I’ve seen, nor on http://www.babycenter.com/, which has a database of over 99.9% of all English names. Maybe if they were learning Norwegian, “Jesper” would be a good name. Heck, maybe even “table” is a good name in some language, somewhere. I don’t think names like that serve English students well, though.
March 4th, 2006 at 1:16 am
btw…here a really cool site to scout out the popularity of names in the US over the last century: http://babynamewizard.com/namevoyager/lnv0105.html
it has a unique interface that fun to use.
March 4th, 2006 at 2:59 am
Warren, that site’s interface rocks! It also vindicates my name-nazi-ness by the fact that despite the fact that it has the names of over a million babies born in the US, Coco, Jesper, etc… are NOT listed. :p
May 2nd, 2006 at 11:21 am
One of my favorite Mo Da Wei moments was when I was getting ready to open a new class, and one of the secretaries came to ask me about a ’situation’. Apparently, I had 3 ‘Angel’s in my new class.
I did a double-groan, first of all because it’s extremely annoying to have even two kids of the same name in a class — you have to resort to lame monikers like “Tony 1″ and “Tony 2″ or “Jacky C.” and “Jacky L.” On top of that however, I have a particular problem with the name “Angel”, as I thus expressed to the secretary:
“Oh God…Angel…that’s such a HOOKER name!” (Which also goes for names like “Coco”, “Mimi” and “Cherry”)
The secretary looked at me admonishingly, however, and it suddenly occurred to me that the head secretary of our school is a dignified (and slightly stern) woman of the name…you guessed it…Angel! Oops!
What added to the humor of the moment was the fact that the then school manager, Muneer happened to be sitting at his desk and overheard the conversation. Normally, Muneer -famous for his slightly exaggerated Ward Cleaver-esque manner of speaking - is rather formal in a PC, company man sort of way, so I was a little surprised to hear him chuckle as he shook his head at my mis-speak. However, he had yet to show me his true ability to appreciate the humor of the moment.
Later that night, there was a parent-teacher meeting, during which the secretaries and manager give a shpeel and the parents have a chance to have a look at me. My new students were all there in their little desks, with the parents alongside and in the back as is customary at Mo Da Wei. I was in an empty desk behind the students. The secretary from earlier was at the front, babbling about classroom rules. Manager Muneer was sitting in a corner at the front of the class, perfect posture, hands folded gracefully, a cherib-like expression of wisdom and serenity on his face as the secretary brought up the ‘3 Angel’ problem to the group. At that moment, Muneer and I made eye-contact, and without the slightest change of expression, Muneer mouthed the word “HOOKER” to me.
With the eyes of my new parents glaring intently at the back of the head of this guy who they were putting in charge of their precious little sprogs — with all those little kids sitting there waiting for me to give some hint of who I was and what they were in for at that notoriously draconian school — I began to tremble. To quiver. To giggle. To gufaw. And finally, tears rolling down my cheaks, to out-and-out howl.
I’ve never laughed so hard before or since. I was laughing so hard I unceremoniously sprang a boner…perhaps my body’s way of expressing its joy at that sudden, unexpected and unmitigated release of tension in that most inappropriate of circumstances.
What was even more brilliant was that my mirth was contagious. It lept over the heads of the bewildered children, past the secretary oggling me admonishingly, and took possession of poor Muneer.
Trying to maintain an atmosphere of cool austerity in spite of my apparent insanity, Muneer himself began to do an impression of “The Thinker”, back bowed, shoulders slumped, face under his hand as he tried to hide the Jekyl-and-Hyde transformation that was taking control of him. He too began to tremble, to quiver, and then - to the bewilderment of everyone except me - in four great strides he was across the classroom and out the door, to suffer his breakdown in in the only dignified way he could — inside a bathroom stall.
I have never since been able to hear the name “Angel” without breaking a smile.
June 29th, 2006 at 10:37 pm
I explain this by saying that I have a Chinese name.
“What is it?” they ask.
好。 我的中文名字是 “Khedhleppit”.
“这个不是是一个中文名字！＂
I know. And JEEsper isn’t an English name.
July 2nd, 2006 at 4:51 am
I teach English on the mainland and the same “English” name problem is common. I usually try to tackle it in the first lesson with a new class. I explain that my friend is learning Chinese, and I want to run some possible Chinese names past them…
Yanjing Yiping (a pun on a local beer brand)
Lei Feng (such a heroic name!)
Zhang Q (Zhang’s the most popular Chinese family name, and Lu Xun’s Ah Q was a typical Chinese person, so it must be great, right?)
++ Guofan (where ++ is a ‘character’ I’ve created, pronounced Tom)
This helps the students to understand. I then give students with unconventional names a list of suggestions. If students are really recalcitrant, I just use their Chinese name. Sometimes you must be cruel to be kind.
November 3rd, 2006 at 3:33 pm
Dear Warren,
I just may be the English teacher who gave you your English name 20-some years ago. If so, it was by no means
randomly assigned, nor was it for my convenience so as not to have to remember those “weird Chinese names”. I gave English names to the students whose parents wanted them to have them. I spent hours pouring over the Chinese dictionary to determine what the kids’ names meant in Chinese so I could select a comparable English name. If I couldn’t find a name with a similar meaning, I went for sound– nice English names that had some of the same sounds as your name. If your are “my” Warren, I gave you the name of my favorite, very educated uncle, and your mother was very impressed and honored.
I speak Chinese, so the names were not a crutch for me, they were demanded by the parents, as I said. However, my students didn’t know that I spoke Chinese since I never used it in class, just English. I loved my students and worked very hard to make learning English fun and successful. I still am in contact with some of those students from the 80’s, and we are good friends.
Furthermore, I steered clear of such over-used names as Johnny, Jummy, Sandy, Tina, Jenny and Jeannie, etc. Rather, I gave names like Richard, Elizabeth, Patricia, James, Colin and Patrick. I used full names, not diminutives to lend elegance and maturity.
I also tried to get parents to change undesirable names, such as Pinkie and Sweetie who came to me with these names bestowed on them from their grandfather. How do you tell the parents their little 5-year-old’s name sounds like a whore?
If I was your teacher, you knew me as Miss Han or Mrs.Owens and attended class in my home in Tianmou. In any case, you have kept the name your teacher gave you which you didn’t have to do. If you don’t want it, change it to something that has meaning for you. I wish you all the best.
November 12th, 2006 at 6:49 am
I know a couple of Cocos. They both said it was a famous (Chinese) singer’s English name. They are not “irony compliant” enough to discuss with them whether the singer originally got the name from a stripper.
November 13th, 2006 at 8:32 pm
CoCo is also the nom de guerre of a political cartoonist in Taiwan. He comes out with great stuff.
November 18th, 2006 at 7:08 am
I have a Chinese name. no one uses it. Taiwanese have these names so they can try to pass themselves off as “from” America. countless times i have heard weird pronunciations of words from Taiwanese who think that they are talking like Americans. remember, its not important that one actually is fluent in English - only that one can fool the Taiwanese sitting next to them (which explains why people ask “are you sure?” when you answer the question “how are you?” - that is the next phrase they remember from the textbook). these matronly names that females choose are idiotic, as well as those pre-war popular favorites like “Oscar” that men choose. its not about making it “easier” for foreigners (many of whom speak Chinese quite well). its about separating one’s self from the generation of Taiwanese who would never take an Englishee name. if you want to have some fun, ask your Taiwanese friends what their real names are and then try to use them exclusively. then, insist that they call _you_ by your Chinese name. then, insist that they speak only in Chinese to help _you_ with your language development. see what happens. if strangers come up to me on the street and are obviously trying to waste my time with practicing English (and not interested in talking with _me_ as a person), i tell them that i don’t speak English (in Chinese). by the look on their faces its clear that they are under the impression that everyone, everywhere speaks English (and is at their disposal for practice as well).
November 18th, 2006 at 9:10 am
Bushman, do you use your Chinese name when you introduce yourself? If I’m teaching, of course I want my students to call me either Mark or Mr. Wilbur, but outside of work, I introduce myself as 小馬 and it usually sticks. If people call me Mark, though, that’s okay, too. It is the name my mother gave me, after all. I don’t like being called “mock”, though.
This semester, I’ve changed some more students’ names:
Canny -> Kenny
Olive -> Olivia
Jeson -> Jason
Some parents were a bit resistant, and I told them they can call their kids whatever they want, but that they have to use an actual English name in my class. If a kid wanted to use his real name, that would be fine too, of course. I usually just tell them that if they don’t like the names I pick for them they can use any name that shows up after 1950 on the Name Voyager.
November 19th, 2006 at 9:56 am
Some of my ‘favourite’ names I heard in Taiwan are:
Masseratti, Hazard, Marlboro
I dont like these names but it is really hard not to remember them..maybe this is the aim..
December 27th, 2006 at 12:15 am
I never had a problem with my name being written in katakana in Japan. In fact, I liked being called ジムさん by my Japanese teachers. On the other hand, I take exception to being required to have a Chinese name in Taiwan, probably because none of the names I’ve been given (and I’ve been given several) sound anything like…well, me.
I worked for a language school in Tokyo that did encourage its students (adults) to take English names for use in the classrooms. The idea was that, by taking on an English persona so to speak, the students could relax and be more willing to open up when expressing themselves in English. It seemed to work. Many students who became good friends with their classmates would continue to use their English nicknames with each other outside of class as well. In some cases, they didn’t even know their newfound friends’ real (Japanese) names.
September 24th, 2008 at 1:28 am
[...] written before about the crazy English names people in Taiwan often go by. This year, though, there’s something entirely new for [...]